santa exe
by Notyouraverageloser-chan
Summary: The only thing that kinda sucks about living on a tropical island is that the weather is the same all year round. So what are you supposed to do when you're a 9 year old genius who wants snow on Christmas? You build an invention for that, of course.


The only thing that kinda sucks about living on a tropical island is that the weather is the same all year round. And while yeah, it's pretty nice to have warm weather all the time, Tails had to admit it was sort of ruining the mood for Christmas. It just wasn't the same as Christmas on the mainland. There was no snow, and it wasn't cold, so there wasn't any need for warm sweaters or scarves or hot cocoa or anything like that. Not to mention that Christmas Eve just happened to fall on the hottest day of the year...

So what are you supposed to do when you're a 9 year old genius who wants snow on Christmas?

You build an invention for that, of course.

****************  
"Sonic, you have to promise not to tell anyone yet, okay?" Tails held the little box firmly in his hands, glaring at the blue hedgehog slumped on the couch. He trusted Sonic but he knew his older brother had a big mouth, and he didn't want the surprise to be ruined. "I think this has to be my greatest invention yet!"  
Sonic's eyes widened. "Really? Does it make unlimited chili dogs?"  
"Nope, even better!" Tails set the cardboard box on the floor and opened it to reveal a tiny, square shaped contraption covered in buttons. "I call it the Freeze-ometer!"  
Sonic was about to comment on how that was the most uncreative name Tails had come up with so far, but the little fox had already started blabbing on.  
"This device increases the freezing temperature of any liquid within a 50 foot radius. Right now I'm trying to increase its range to at least 2 miles," Tails said. And when he saw Sonic staring at him blankly, he said, "It makes snow. You know, for Christmas."  
"Well that's cool, Tails, but if you really wanted snow for Christmas you coulda just asked Santa to bring it for you," Sonic said.  
Tails frowned. "Santa's not real. This," he said, pointing to the Freeze-ometer, "definitely is. Besides I don't like the idea of some old guy coming in my house in the middle of the night. Like Eggman."  
"Yeah, Santa probably is just Eggman in a suit." Sonic snickered at the thought of his arch nemesis waddling around in a red suit, dropping bombs into people's chimneys. "But I guess it would be pretty awesome if everyone's Christmas wishes came true. Well, as long as they don't interfere with mine. "  
"Oh, Sonic what do you want for Christmas?" Tails came to sit down next to him. "A lot of chili dogs?"  
"Nah, I want to get laid," Sonic said absentmindedly.  
"What?"  
"WELL WOULD YOU LOOK AT THE TIME," Sonic said nervously, "I told Amy I was gonna help her bake cookies. See ya!" And then he was gone in half a second.

Tails sighed. Even though he knew Santa Claus wasn't real he still hoped that somehow a miracle would happen and it would snow tomorrow. He was hoping to surprise the whole village with the Freeze-ometer tomorrow, but no one knew better than Tails himself that he didn't exactly have the best track record with that sort of thing.

* * *

You know, most kids would probably stay up late waiting for Santa on Christmas Eve, but Tails waited for Sonic to fall asleep before he slipped out of his house to go work on the Freeze-ometer. Sure, he'd made a lot of mistakes with his inventions in the past, but he was going to get it right this time!  
No sooner had he opened the big wooden doors that Tails began to get the feeling that he wasn't in there alone. He heard shuffling and...very quiet laughter?  
"Knuckles," Tails called out into the dark, "I know you're homeless, but I told you you're not allowed to sleep in here anymore."  
No answer.  
Tails took a few tentative steps forward. He knew ghosts weren't real either, but he couldn't help worrying that they might be haunting the workshop.  
"Wrong holiday," he told himself. "It's Christmas Eve, not Halloween."

He reached on the wall for the light switch and as soon the lights were on, he was faced by one of the most horrifying sights he had ever seen.

A old human man, with a long white beard and a red cap was sitting right there on his workbench, grinning at him with fanged teeth and what appeared to be blood dripping from his eyes. He held the Freeze-ometer in his hand, bouncing it up and down. The being spoke.

HO HO HO,

it bellowed.

Tails practically tripped over himself trying to run out the door.

* * *

As soon as Tails got into the house he locked the door and ran over to the couch where Sonic was loudly snoring.  
Tails ripped the blanket off the hedgehog and tried to shake him awake. "Sonic!" he hissed quietly, "you gotta wake up! It's an emergency!"

Sonic groaned and pulled the blanket back over his head.

"Sonic! There's a guy outside!"  
"Look," Sonic muttered, "if Knuckles is sleeping under the porch again just bribe him with some cookies."  
Tails facepalmed in exasperation. "It's not him. I think it's Santa," he said, realizing how dumb he sounded.  
Dumb as it sounded, that got Sonic up. "Oh damn. Really?" He shot up off the couch. "Where is he?"  
"In the workshop," Tails said, grabbing Sonic's arm so he wouldn't run off to go see that...thing. "But he doesn't look friendly. He looks like some sort of maniac or something."  
"Awww," Sonic mocked, "are you afraid of Santa Claus, Tails?"  
"Yeah, I am! And you would be too if you saw him." Tails began rummaging around in his cupboard, looking for a flashlight. "I'm pretty sure he's still outside the house, and he's touching my inventions! My babies!"  
Sonic rolled his eyes. Tails always worried about everything, but he figured the least he could do was go out to check if it would make the little fox feel better about it. "Look kid, I'm Sonic the Hedgehog. I'm not afraid of anything."  
Tails turned on his flashlight and shined the light in Sonic's face. "Well if I recall correctly, Sonic the Hedgehog, you pretty much screamed like a girl that time we rode the log ride at-"  
Sonic zipped over and took the flashlight away from him. "Alright, that's enough, smartass."

* * *

When they finally got to the workshop - loaded with all the weapons Tails insisted were absolutely necessary - "Santa" was gone.  
"He was just here!" Tails said.  
"Why do you sound so disappointed?" Sonic asked dryly. "I thought you said Santa wasn't real?"  
"He's not!"

OH YES I AM. I'mAs REAL AS YOU ARE.

Tails gasped. "That's the voice," he whispered.

I'M RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

Against their better judgement, Sonic and Tails both turned around to see the horrifying creature locking the door behind them. "Oh shit," Sonic muttered under his breath.

HELLO. soNIC. HELLO TAILS.

Tails immediately tried to reach for his laser gun but he found that he couldn't move. He tried to call out to Sonic but realized that he couldn't speak, either.

I TOOKthe FREEZEOMETER. and nowYOU ARE FROZEn

Tails couldn't believe that he'd neglected such an oversight. The Freeze-ometer froze all fluids within a 50 foot radius...including the fluids in his body, which had effectively paralyzed him. And from the corner of his eye he could see that it was affecting Sonic too, who hadn't moved at all.

I WILLMAKE all youR DREAMS COME TRUE.  
I KnoW ALL YOUR DEEPEST DESIRES.

But why was this Santa creature still unaffected? It was walking towards them, slowly, with the same glint in its blood filled eyes, the same toothy grin on its horrifying face.  
Santa wasn't organic, Tails thought. Maybe it was a robot?  
The only thing Tails could think of before he blacked out was that he didn't really like the sound of that.

 **based off a story i wrote for my friend! and yeah, santa claus is pretty wack lmao**


End file.
